“It’s me. I’m here. Don’t be afraid”

My daughter loves role playing. Most times there is a story running in her head, whether she is drawing or playing with Legos, or playdough or even just singing. When she finishes a drawing and brings it to me, it’s always very interesting and fun to listen to her as she explains what she has drawn. There is a story there. Even when she sings, she sometimes changes the words and adds her own story there and it’s pretty interesting and amusing to listen to that.

This role playing is a big part of her play time too. So we are at this indoor playground and there’s this big maze kind of an area to climb, jump, crawl, with rope bridges, rope ladders and so much more. My daughter loves running around this place. She drags me along to run around with her. And then she’s like – ‘Mama, you can be the big bad wolf’. For whatever reasons, I am mostly the bad guy. I’m either the big bad wolf, or the troll (from the billy goats gruff), or the bad monsters (not just a monster, a ‘bad’ monster!!). Let’s hope it’s just because I have to do the chasing and for no other reason! :D

But anyways, so I am the big bad wolf and she and her friends are the piggies and I have to run after them and catch them. They are small and so flexible and it’s easy for them to run and crawl through the small spaces and they are much ahead of me mostly as I run after them. 

My daughter is all laughs and giggles and squeals and screams as she runs with her friends. Sometimes when I get too close, I slow down and pretend like she’s just escaped from my grasp. And you should hear the loud squeal as she runs away, thinking she’s very cleverly escaped.

But every once in a while, I think the role playing gets very real to her. She’s sometimes so lost in this world, that the line between imagination and reality is lost, and suddenly it feels real to her. So sometimes as I run behind her with my fingers out like claws, growling (No, wolves don’t growl, I need to remember to howl like a wolf next time, I don’t want my daughter growing up thinking wolves growl), and shouting –‘I am going to catch you’ ’I am going to eat you’, I sometimes see she gets worried. She stops running and turns to look at me and goes – ‘Mamma?’. Initially I didn’t know that it sometimes got a little real to her. But now I do. So now I stop my ‘big bad wolf’ act and turn back into ‘Mama’, and we laugh and tickle and laugh and snuggle a bit, before she says –‘Mama, now you can be the troll’, and the running chasing starts again.

What if our fear is an illusion too? What if it isn’t real? What if the truth is greater? Greater than our fear?

When Jesus walked towards the boat in which his disciples were, in the dark of the night. They were afraid and Jesus said to them, “It is I, don’t be afraid”.

What if we realised that behind every fear, stood Jesus saying, “It’s me. I’m here. Don’t be afraid”??

God is bigger than my fears. If I am truly aware of that, isn’t my fear much smaller than it seems to be. Combat fear with faith. And no matter how afraid you are, do it afraid. You may be shivering with fright, but take that step to move forward. Don’t let fear hold you back. I think most situation get blown up more than it is, by fear, which is what makes me think of fear more as an illusion. At such times I like to remember that God understands and stands with me saying, “It is me. I am here. Don’t be afraid”. 

John 6:20 - They were scared senseless, but he reassured them, “It’s me. It’s all right. Don’t be afraid.” (MSG)

Matthew 14:27 - But Jesus was quick to comfort them. “Courage, it’s me. Don’t be afraid.” (MSG)

Isaiah 41:10 - ‘Do not fear [anything], for I am with you;
Do not be afraid, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you, be assured I will help you;
I will certainly take hold of you with My righteous right hand [a hand of justice, of power, of victory, of salvation].’ (AMP)

Birthday Parties and a Trust lesson…

We get out of the lift and just as we are about to enter the indoor playground, the venue of my daughter’s friend’s birthday party, I hand her the gift she needs to give to her friend. She takes it from my hand and goes running towards her friend. As I watch her run, screaming and so excited, I just feel so blissful and so happy.


And as I walk behind her, I think of all the events that have led to this point. All the planning and scheduling that I have been a part of. Some that she has been aware of and some that she has no idea about. But how trusting has she been. And because I love her sooo sooo much, I wouldn’t want to break that trust and would do everything I could and the best that I could.

This reminds me of so many happy moments in my life and makes me think of the events that led me to that point. Some that maybe I am aware of, and maybe most that I am not aware of as God worked silently behind the scenes. Sometimes I have had to wait patiently. Sometimes I have kicked a tantrum. But God has always always been faithful and so trustworthy. This makes me think of things I have been waiting on God for. Do I trust Him as I wait? Do I trust him knowing He is working behind the scene?

About a month back I got her friend’s party invite, as a simple mail from her parents asking to block the date and that the formal invite card would come later. My daughter is unaware. I check the date and see if she is free and if she isn’t, see if things can be rescheduled. I know my daughter loves birthday parties and wouldn’t want to miss it. And she loves her friend too. So I RSVP the parents back and tell them we would be very happy to join and thank them for inviting us. My daughter is still unaware. I check with the parents for what gift their child would like. I check shops, online stores for something the child would love. I place the order. My daughter is not at a place where she can select something the kid likes. She usually selects something she likes thinking that would make the kid as happy as it makes her. So I take that decision for her, till she gets there.

About a week before the birthday party, my daughter receives her invite. She is excited as she opens it. She is excited as she asks ‘Mama, can we go?’ ‘Can we go, please?’ She goes running to her friend to tell her she will be there for her birthday. She is super excited. She sticks the card on her wall (a door where she sticks stuff she likes).

About two days before the party, the gifts I have ordered online arrive. I show them to her and she is excited again.  I gift wrap them. Meanwhile I check the venue, to make sure she has proper comfortable clothes to wear. Or if it’s a theme party, if she has whatever she would need.

On the morning of the party, one of the first things she remembers as soon as she wakes up, is the party. We sit together and write, draw, decorate her card. We stick them on to her gifts.

All this leads us to the point where she goes running off with the gifts in hand, screaming her friends name, so excited, so happy. As a parent, I soak in that moment. It’s a beautiful happy memory.

If as a human being I can do this, how much more will our heavenly Father who is God, do for us. Do I trust him enough for things that are unseen? Do I trust him enough to take those decisions for me, that I am not capable of taking yet? Do I trust that He will do only that which is good for me? Do I trust him to know He is able to make all things beautiful?

His love for me is sooo much bigger than anything I could ever feel or action for my daughter. I am reminded of that as I walk in to wish her friend and her friend’s parents, all the while still hearing my daughter’s happy noises in the background.

Matthew 7:11 - If you then, evil (sinful by nature) as you are, know how to give good and advantageous gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven [perfect as He is] give what is good and advantageous to those who keep on asking Him.

Proverbs 3:5 - Trust in and rely confidently on the Lord with all your heart
And do not rely on your own insight or understanding.